To readers who live with a severe mental illness: you may know what it’s like to accidentally take the wrong medication dose.
Last night I did something that’s left me pretty tired and spacey today: I accidentally took the aripiprazole that I had in my case for the next morning. This drug is an antipsychotic that works well for me, and has the nice effect of jumpstarting my motivation in the morning.
When I open my eyes at 6 AM, I customarily take that dose and SHAZAM!—my mind floods with all the things I want to take care of that day. It really gets me going.
So, by mistakenly taking it at night and thus skipping it this morning, the molasses remains in my head even now, at 3 in the afternoon. I’m looking forward to having my usual energy back tomorrow.
I feel sad when friends tell stories of family members who have gone off their meds entirely, without a doctor’s input. I know how they feel, because I’ve done that too. When I was first diagnosed in 1990, I hated the meds I took, and it was only the unswerving (and wise) dedication of my parents that ensured that I kept taking them. In 1996, I was living alone and thus had the opportunity to single-handedly choose to “taper off” the clozapine I was taking, hoping that I would be better without it. That was a disaster. I had a relapse, lost my job and then-career path, and spent 2 weeks in the hospital. It took me about 2 years to get somewhat stable again.
I’m such a fast learner that I tried that a few more times. Lucky for me I was able to resume my med doses again, each time, before any more serious issues developed. Whew!
Now, after not messing with any doses for a year and a half, I feel stably great about life.
If you take psychiatric medication and don’t like the way it makes you feel, I encourage you to talk with your doctor about it, and try to work it out with him or her. Even if you find that staying on the same med dose is the best choice for now, it doesn’t have to be forever. Check out articles on the research of Drs. Francis Lee and Andrew Pieper to learn about some of the incredible possibilities on the horizon.
I have known over a dozen psychiatrists, and every one of them knows his or her stuff and really does care. One of them, Dr. Vikaas Sohal, told me “it is a privilege to work with patients during challenging parts of their lives.” A doctor like that is there for you. Building trust with one is worth it.
